(Not Your Momma’s) Fried Chicken

Posted on March 17, 2011. Filed under: chicken, poultry, recipe, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , |

I was craving fried chicken yesterday. What I ended up eating was something that wasn’t quite what I was craving but was nearly as satisfying. Perhaps even more satisfying, if you add creativity bonus points. Alright, perhaps not. There isn’t any kind of “fried” chicken that satisfies like a piece of skin-on chicken that has taken a delicious bath in bubbling oil. Still, this was pretty damn good.

What did I do? In a sense I deconstructed fried chicken. Deconstructing things is fun, but fun isn’t why this happened. Now I didn’t set out to be a clever beaver or anything. So why did I do it? I’ll give you two choices, and you can decide which one is true.

One: I set out to construct a lower calorie “fried” chicken that is just as enjoyable as its deep fried cousin. We all hate calories, right? And deep frying is ever so evil and wicked and full of death. “Fried” chicken should be baked chicken, because that’s what’s good for our souls and our waistlines. And oven baked chicken tastes better, right? Oh yes. So much better, all dried out and sad. So I deconstructed in hope that it might taste better. Perhaps the chicken wouldn’t be so dry.

Two: I was craving fried chicken but had cleaned my deep fryer the other day and hadn’t procured new oil.

You decide. Either way, I got creative. Here’s what I did:

I prepared Chicken Variation #3. Simple as can be.

While that was cooking, I made a breading.

3 Tablespoons Ground Raw Macadamia Nuts*
3 Tablespoons Panko
3 Tablespoons Pine Nuts**
2 Teaspoons Melted Butter

Toss mix in a medium-hot pan for 2 minutes, and then add:
3 Tablespoons Parmesan Cheese

Stir until mix is golden brown. This should take about another 2 minutes. Keep a close watch- it can go from beautiful to burned quickly.
Remove breading from pan, and allow to cool for a few minutes.
Cut cooked chicken into cubes.
Put in a bowl or plastic bag, add breading, shake or toss to cover.

* Make sure the macadamia nuts are raw. Pulse whole nuts in food processor or spice grinder until roughly the same size at the panko.

** You don’t have to limit yourself to pine nuts. Try any combination you like. I just happened to have extra pine nuts on hand. Raw walnuts or almonds would be nice, too. Make sure to process them to the same size as the panko.

*** If preparing this dish within 20 miles of a southerner, rename dish. Don’t even try to pretend it’s fried chicken. They will be angry. Call it Nutty Yankee Chicken Bake, or something like that.


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4 Responses to “(Not Your Momma’s) Fried Chicken”

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your jokes are good enough to make me want to try this recipe with fake chicken!

This would probably work well with fake chicken, but only if you do so in hilarious fashion.

“Nutty Yankee Chicken Bake” sounds like an awesome name for this dish.

It sounds like an awesome name for many things!

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